Quotes from Martin Short


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What I learned, a little too late, was that the 'traditional' Martin Short target viewer weighs under 300 pounds. Unfortunately, I was on during daytime.


You go through publicists because it's easy for a publicist to say to another publicist, 'No'.


I've done lots of improv things but not a whole movie.


I have sometimes imagined my own death and brought myself to tears.


Sometimes people get passionate about the obscure jokes.


One of my great influences was Don Knotts as Barney Fife.


I've never done an improvised movie as a fictitious character. I think that's the challenge.


I think loss can fuel how you lead your whole life.


I know if I were to drop dead now, people would probably write nice things in the obit.


I have a kind of objective luxury about my career.


Being the youngest of five, you're adored, you're fueled with confidence.


My mother was the concert master of the symphony. Absurdity and eccentricity were not criticized.


All these things that enter your head are assignments. You write them up and then throw them out there and if someone wants to do it, your assignment is done.


David Lynch and I almost made a movie together in the late '80s. We had lots of dinners and lunches. He's a very cool, hip guy. This film, let's face it, is like an homage to him, I would imagine he'd find it funny.


You try to figure out things to keep yourself interested. It's very easy to get lulled.


What's great about being a character actor is you know that you can survive forever. It's not about the gloss of your eyebrows.


Someone once asked me what was the weirdest question I was ever asked. And I was stymied.


People do think I'm Jewish. But we're Irish Catholic. My father had a brogue.


I've chosen to treat my life more like a party than something to stress about.


I pretend I'm one of the royal family when I'm in a hotel and that the hotel belongs to me - it is a palace.