Sometimes I wish that I was the weather, you'd bring me up in conversation forever. And when it rained, I'd be the talk of the day.

- John Mayer

Look, demanding somebody do anything in this day and age is not going to fly.

- John Mayer

Sometimes it feels like my life is just one long day.

- John Mayer

It's very liberating when you finally realize it's impossible to make everyone like you.

- John Mayer

I knew what I wanted to do when I was 13 and I had to go through four years of high school to get out. That's a blessing, because I never had to lay on my bed staring up at the ceiling going, 'What am I going to do with my life?'

- John Mayer

When you're just open but not honest, then you start free-associating garbage.

- John Mayer

Ladies, if you want to know the way to my heart... good spelling and good grammar, good punctuation, capitalize only where you are supposed to capitalize, it's done.

- John Mayer

You get to a certain age where you prepare yourself for happiness. Sometimes you never remember to actually get happy.

- John Mayer

I have the obsessiveness of someone who's a sober, recovering addict displacing his addiction. Except I never had the addiction.

- John Mayer

A man's got two shots for jewelry: a wedding ring and a watch. The watch is a lot easier to get on and off than a wedding ring.

- John Mayer

Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you're really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I've got a few missing.

- John Mayer

I've realized you can use a fork as a spoon if you use it rapidly enough.

- John Mayer

I'd like to think the best of me was still hiding up in my sleeve.

- John Mayer

I hope that what it comes down to at the end of the day is that people believe that I believe what I'm singing. It comes down to being believable. You don't have to be likeable; generally, though, I think I am.

- John Mayer

I can't even explain to you how terrible that feels, that I equate dating a woman with punishment, shame, guilt, disappointment, reproach, reprimand, persecution. It's a nightmare.

- John Mayer

I hate being the heartbreaker. Hate it. If I date somebody and it doesn't work out, it's another nightmare for me.

- John Mayer

Maybe someday you can accuse somebody of being a poseur by selling out and playing blues music, but that's just not going to happen in my lifetime.

- John Mayer

If you get half a million, at a certain stage you probably will get 4 million people, if they are able to hear it. The touring thing is unbelievable. It really is amazing from what we did the last tour even to what we are doing now.

- John Mayer

You cannot avoid war in life, you cannot avoid the fear of terrorism, you cannot avoid those things now, they are a part of everyday demeanor.

- John Mayer

When you do an interview with me, you're talking to a cheap imitation of the person that I really am. There's no magic in my words, it's just me talking.

- John Mayer