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Joe E. Lewis Quotes - IQDb - Internet Quotes Database

Quotes from Joe E. Lewis


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    It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor - as long as you've got money.

    Money | Rich | Poor


    We can afford almost any mistake once.

    Mistake | Almost | Afford


    Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.

    Money | Bum


    I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise.

    Stand | Noise | Bomb


    I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin.

    Drink | Next | Dean


    I drink to forget I drink.

    Forget | Drink


    You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

    Work


    Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants on.

    Feet | Pants | Ground


    If you want to make a dangerous man your friend, let him do you a favor.

    Friend | Dangerous | Favor


    I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

    Remember | Chasing


    I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.

    Diet | Tired | Doctor


    I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves.

    Money | Nerves


    Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people.

    Time | Genius | Wrong


    I always wake up at the crack of ice.

    Crack | Ice | Wake


    A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

    Drunk | Floor | Holding


    Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.

    Water | Scotch | Dirty


    Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest.

    Friend | Pest


    There's only one thing money won't buy, and that is poverty.

    Money | Poverty | Buy


    It pays to get drunk with the best people.

    Best | Drunk | Pays


    They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses.

    Glasses | Table | Stomach


       

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