Quotes from Johnny Knoxville


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I have a whole slew of doctors. I can count eight in my phone right now - eight different doctors, all for different parts of my body. I have specialists.


I'm so uncoordinated, I can't really do that much, so my specialty is standing in one spot or holding on to something, like an exploding rocket or a jetski.


It's just an unhealthy way to approach something, trying to outdo your last thing. You've gotta trust evolution, you've gotta trust that the bar is moving, that you don't need to force the bar. It'll just happen.


People try to challenge me in bars every now and then. As long as they're not physical I just walk away, but if they get physical then I just end up in a fight.


When I used to go into bars people would try and fight me. Women would punch me 10 years ago or put cigarettes out on my arm or my face. But it doesn't seem to happen any more. They show us a lot of love.


A lot of stand-up comedy guys, when they get a little famous, just give up their stand-up career, and it cancels out the thing that set them apart.


I want to do dramas. I want to do comedies.


I'm just basking in the glory.


The worse the reviews, the better for our demographic.


We're just trying to make ourselves laugh. We realize critics are going to hate it, but it just makes fans like it more.


You were about five feet short of a ten feet jump?


It's a real primal thing, watching someone get hurt. It's funny and accessible.


I just try to think of all the things that could go wrong so in that split second when it happens, maybe your body reacts in a way where it protects you just a little.


My parents said that I was nine months old and would throw myself out of the crib onto the floor continually. As soon as they left the room after putting me back in they'd hear a big bump and I'd be on the floor again.


Suffering will get you great footage. I don't know about closer to God. Although there have been times when I've suffered to the point where I think I might be about to meet him.


I do get obsessed with constantly thinking of ideas, all day long, but that's just how it is.


I love the tabloids except for when I'm in 'em.


I'm the fun dad, I am also the disciplinarian.


If someone hits me I consider it a challenge.


What calmed me down finally was when my girlfriend got pregnant.