Quotes from Bernie Mac


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I learned hard lessons in life; I had to because I had so much happen: My mother died my sophomore year in high school. The next year, same day, my brother dropped dead. Two years after that, I got married because my girlfriend got pregnant. The year after my wedding, my father - who I had only recently met - died.


I came up in the community center. I used to be physical director of the South Central Community Center in Chicago on 83rd. It's still there. It used to be around there when I was a kid.


When I started in the clubs, I had to work places where didn't nobody else want to work. I had to do clubs where street gangs were, had to do motorcycle gangs, gay balls and things of that nature.


Fear is not one of my attributes.


You don't see me in Los Angeles a lot. I go back home. Because I can't play the game. I can't - my tolerance - I know I'm getting old; I'll be 50 this year. And you know how I know I'm getting old? 'Cause my tolerance level is low.


I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.


Only way you can you get upset is when you expecting something.


I don't have no story. Everybody wants this Hollywood story, but the world don't owe you nothing, man. It's what you owe the world.


Bernie Mac just says what you think but are afraid to say.


I'm looking for laughs, you know? If it take me to flip over a table, if I have to go physical comedy, I will do it. But whatever the joke needs at that particular time, is where I'm dedicated to. I'm not into beating somebody down and beating myself up. I don't do insults and things like that. I don't do it - I'm a storyteller.


When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars - that's heaven here on earth.


I love my daughter, but there's a certain feeling, a certain emotion when you got a granddaughter, you know?


Jerry Weintraub, the producer, might be a pain in the ass, but he really knows how to treat his actors.


People like rumors. They're going to say things like, 'You was at the club with Lil' Kim, and you and Kanye West got into a fist fight.' You can't get upset. You've got to keep hope alive.


I'm not a star, and I don't want to be a star. Stars fall. I'm an ordinary guy with an extraordinary job.


I can act. I've been acting for a long time, but like anything else, don't nobody owe you nothing. You've go to pay your dues. You go from A to Z; you don't go from M to Z.


When you're offstage, that's the footprint. That's the man God's gonna judge.


I can't build myself by beating somebody down.


If I can tell someone a story that makes them bend over and laugh, that's bigger than anything else.


There's no success story. Everybody's got a ghetto story. You always want to make it bigger than what it is.