Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

- Clive James

It is only when they go wrong that machines remind you how powerful they are.

- Clive James

A life without fame can be a good life, but fame without a life is no life at all.

- Clive James

Anyone afraid of what he thinks television does to the world is probably just afraid of the world.

- Clive James

Everyone has a right to a university degree in America, even if it's in Hamburger Technology.

- Clive James

Disco dancing is just the steady thump of a giant moron knocking in an endless nail.

- Clive James

Even in moments of tranquility, Murray Walker sounds like a man whose trousers are on fire.

- Clive James

She was good at playing abstract confusion in the same way that a midget is good at being short.

- Clive James

Whoever called snooker 'chess with balls' was rude, but right.

- Clive James

Fiction is life with the dull bits left out.

- Clive James