You need fighters like me to battle, because frankly The New York Times and the Washington Post are not going to fight the fights that I do.

- Al Goldstein

Philosophy is an attempt by man to find cause and effect. Religion has the same goal.

- Al Goldstein

In reality there is no cause or effect, there is only the indifference of the universe.

- Al Goldstein

I keep attacking the villains, the know-nothings, the people who want to take our freedoms away.

- Al Goldstein

I am not a prisoner of my sexuality like men younger than myself although I write about being a prisoner.

- Al Goldstein

Even though marriage is doomed, if you turned it into a job you like and really work at it - it can be salvaged.

- Al Goldstein

There is a cliche that men want their women to be ladies in public and hookers behind closed doors. I want my woman to be the sharper image robot so that she can be turned off.

- Al Goldstein

To date or not to date that is the question. It's almost as important as Shakespeare's to be or not to be which deals with death.

- Al Goldstein

The only way marriage can work is if a man respects the woman and she is a thinking woman and he wants to work on the marriage.

- Al Goldstein

Our stock in trade is raw, flailing sex.

- Al Goldstein

Our photographs are filthier and our stories are more disgusting. We make no effort to be artistic.

- Al Goldstein

For me working on the marriage and not making the easy choice of cheating was something that I could not do.

- Al Goldstein

So, if anatomy is destiny then testosterone is doom.

- Al Goldstein

The true success is the person who invented himself.

- Al Goldstein

Married sex is like being awake during your own autopsy. It is root canal work without anesthetic.

- Al Goldstein

Married life is an existence with bars around it.

- Al Goldstein

I'm a crusader. I really believe in the First Amendment, and I use it fully, and I pay a price for that.

- Al Goldstein

Celebrity gives us delusion of self importance.

- Al Goldstein

I refuse to be silenced.

- Al Goldstein

If you cannot work on the marriage or the women is a moron, staying married and cheating makes the most sense because divorce is disruptive to the family life and your bank account.

- Al Goldstein